Palmarini's handicap dive saves win

Illuminati veteran Jim Palmarini came out of retirement to help his team Monday night and was immediately asked to lose one for the Gipper.

Palmarini took a handicap dive to help the IBT salvage a win in the first game of a divisional series with the Lost Corner Bar team. The Illuminati lost the night 5-2, but it could have been worse without Palmarini's heroics.

The handicap dive--known in some quarters as the pas de gutter--is a complex mathematical and athletic maneuver that involves bowling just badly enough to change the outcome of a game that has already been played. League bowling is unique among sports--and possibly unique in the entire universe of Newtonian physics--in providing a way for competitors to influence events ex post facto.

To work a handicap dive, a bowler has to begin the evening's series without an established handicap. Palmarini, who had not competed in the Tavern League this season, was the only eligible member of the IBT foursome. He attacked the problem with gusto, turning in a precision-rolled 166, 130, 129: 425 to lower his average (and inflate his handicap) just enough in the course of the second and third games to give his team a four-pin win the first. If he had converted one more spare, the Illuminati probably would have lost all seven points.

The IBT's record stands at 23-19 (7-7 in the Gutter Division).

The lines
Hunt--168, 164, 133: 465 (145, +3)
Palmarini--166, 130, 129: 425 (142, new)
Peitz--118, 159, 113: 390 (143, -2)
Corathers--158, 143, 192: 493 (150, +3)