First-game blues become rock'n'roll series, 4-3

A short-handed Illuminati Bowling team put an end to a three-week losing streak Monday night, scratching out a hard-fought 4-3 win over the oddly apostrophe'd Blue's Crew.

The IBT improved its record to 44-33 and clung to seventh place in the 28-team Stone's Tavern League, according to unofficial results. (The team's record entering Monday's competition was adjusted to 40-30 after a recalculation of Kevin Pittsnogle's handicap gave the Illuminati a one-pin win in one of its March 28 games against Stoned.)

The Illuminati went with a three-bowler lineup after regular starter Jim Palmarini scratched late. It looked like the reduced IBT squad was in for a night of lowdown gutbucket blues early on as BC posted an alarmingly easy 122-pin win in the first game. The Ills stuck to their game plan, though ("We're going to throw the ball at the pins," was the way Illuminati coach Dave Miley articulated it in a pre-game interview) and pulled out 12-pin and 29-pin wins in the second and third games.

All of the Blue's Crew bowlers were substantially north of their averages in game one, but the IBT coaching staff was especially impressed with the performance of Amanda "Blue" Webster, who is, not to put too fine a point on it, extravagantly pregnant. Barry Bonds, the Illuminati strength and conditioning coach, theorized that Webster's increased central body mass gives her a ballast advantage that actually improves the stability of her delivery, in spite of her slight waddle.

Late Monday night Bonds was reported to be preparing a recommendation that the Illuminati experiment with a pregnant bowler next season, but clubhouse sources said the idea was not being well received among qualified members of the lineup.

The IBT continues its tour of the league's second division next week, facing 25-45 Having a Ball in a 7:00 p.m. Monday matchup. Tickets are still available.

The lines
Palmarini (blind)--130, 130, 130: 390 (140, unch)
Graham--147, 159, 112: 418 (142, unch)
Peitz--143, 150, 148: 441 (146, unch)
Corathers--146, 146, 149: 441 (156, unch)